Marriage License Checklist

We’re going to the courthouse this Friday to sign the marriage papers. There is a mandatory fee of $35 for a ceremony, but I’m not sure what that entails. I’m not sure if we’re expected to dress up or bring wedding bands. The wedding application wasn’t specific.

Last time I was there I saw some women dressed in white and others in a nice outfit. I don’t have very many clothes in white. I own white underwear, but I doubt this will cut it. Most of my clothes are black or brown. And I don’t have any fancy dresses because I tend to dress for comfort. Of course, comfort might not work for me, either.

I was at a party a couple of nights ago and I was wearing a comfortable gray dress with a white collar and white sleeves. I thought it was very romantic Goth. Another guy at the party said I looked like a pilgrim. I don’t want to look like a pilgrim. I just want to be comfortable. I’ll probably just wear something black. If people expect anything more, I can just photoshop the picture of us with me in an outfit to their liking. Just like those paper dolls I used to have that wore paper dresses with the little tabs that folded over their paper shoulders to keep the dress on.

And I hope it’s O.K. if they marry us without wedding bands because we haven’t had time to go shopping for those. I’m sure we will get to that eventually. Of course, at the rate we’re going, Sebastien will probably slip a ring on my finger when I am lying in a coffin. I guess I’ll pack some twistie ties just in case.

All I really care about having this Friday when we go down to the courthouse is a coffee. We’re planing on going to the courthouse first thing in the morning so a cup of coffee will really make the day a memorable one. I’m sure Sebastien would agree.

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About JadedBride

Amy Kraft is a print and radio journalist based in New York. Her work has appeared in publications including Scientific American, Discover, Popular Science, The Week, Psychology Today, and Distillations, a podcast out of the Chemical Heritage Foundation. She is currently working on a book of humor essays. View all posts by JadedBride

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